Double Standards

I am guilty of holding a major double standard.

No, it's not the double standard that some fathers have, where their teenage sons can go and do whatever they want, while their teenage daughters are restricted to curfews. (And let's face it, I've heard it from someone I am quite close to that wasn't a Christian and was a father of teens. The girls weren't allowed out because they could come home pregnant, when the boys couldn't.)

I don't have a double standard about who should or shouldn't be in ministry.

It's not a double standard that I had ever even thought about until recently.

When I was a young, naive 16 year old, I had a friend who wasn't even a Christian. I remember playing truth or dare with her one night, and she was sitting there telling me about how she had "finally lost her virginity." I remember being so upset by that fact. I had grown up in church, in a youth group, in a Christian school where that was a big no-no before you were married. Yes, I had heard every analogy on the subject you could think of. "You're like a flower. Every time you do something with a boy, you give one of your petals away. When you get married, you'll just be a stick."

I'm not even kidding.

Then, a year or two later, a close friend of mine, this time a Christian, told me that she had been living with her boyfriend in every sense of the word. I was angry. How could she not understand that it was wrong?! Or worse, she DID know that it was wrong, but continued to do it anyway!

I was a judgemental fool. I accept that. I promise that I've grown since then. (Come on, I was like 18 and stupid!)

All of that time, I was upset by these things.

The other day, I was watching the season finale of a sitcom I tend to follow during the summer months, called Melissa and Joey. It's a cute little show starring two of the 90's dream teens, all grown up. For three seasons, there was the whole will-they-won't-they sexual tension.

At the end of season three, they ended up sleeping together.

Being the obnoxious TV child that I am, I was all happy because they were finally going to be together.

Then it hit me.

Double standard, much?

Here I am, cheering on all of these television couples...hoping that the writers will finally stop playing with the viewers' heads, and get the couples together, already...yet, I know that in almost every case, especially where the characters are long time friends, it'll happen because they sleep together. Outside of marriage. Always outside of marriage.

Seriously! And I know I'm not the only one. I expect way more of the people around me than the people on television.

No, this realization isn't going to immediately stop me from watching my favorite TV shows, and I'm not going to be unhappy when my nerd side comes out and my favorite couples get together.

But I will think twice about the implications of the double standard our Christian society often holds between the real world all around us, and the shows we find ourselves watching every week.